Jack of all Trades, or The Sibling Type
by mamamittens
Summary: What would it be like if Haruhi not only had to keep up her grades to stay at Ouran, but also house another scholarship student? One who is an orphan who lived too far away? What if this person was the personification of the "Jack of all Trades" and the most determined sibling? Oh no, she's not related, but she sure treats Haruhi like she's her blood! Behold, the Sibling Type...
1. Chapter 1

A tiny girl with long brown hair, that was beginning to turn silver, looked on with sharp gray eyes as delinquents dominated the orphanage playground. She wore a second-hand gray jumper over a white sweater and matching gray pants. She wore battered sneakers that came from an older kid, like everything else she wore. Her parents died in a car crash when their car fell into an icy lake. She suffered head trauma and the shock of the events caused her hair to change colors. A cry of pain echoed in her ears sharply. The head trauma heightened her senses almost painfully, though the doctors believed it would fade with age. She looked over to her left and found a little boy being beaten by two of the orphanage gang members. The adults weren't going to do anything, so that just mean she would have to. With no hesitation she ran forward and blocked a punch to the young boy's ribs.

"Stop."

"Or what? You'll tell mommy and daddy?"

"Yeah, or what? What are you going to do, you look like you're an old lady with all that gray hair!" smoothly adjusting to the hostility, the girl smirked before sweeping the taller gang member's legs from under him.

"That just means I have more experience than you ever will." she said calmly, a look of confidence surrounded her like an aura that was almost visible to the naked eye. The gang member's friend was enraged as he ran at the little girl, easily half his size and a third his weight. But, as the growing crowd noticed, that meant little judging by how fast the older boy was sent flying across the playground. They began to cheer her on until a hard voice stopped them in their tracks.

"What's goin' on 'ere?" at seventeen years old the gang leader was a very imposing figure that no one dared to cross. No one ever said anything about his piercing, his green Mohawk, or any of the tattoos he got over the years. The Yankee accent was a taboo subject unless you wanted to die.

"Well, senpai, I saw this boy getting beat up, so I beat _them_ up." the girl said, looking him directly in the eye despite the sign of respect she displayed in calling him senpai. Then, he did the most unexpected thing. He laughed. A loud roar that some say shook the sparse playground equipment to this very day.

"I like you. Got some moxy in ya! How would ya like ta be my success'r?" he said. The little girl blinked up at him owlishly for a moment.

"What's the catch?" again, he laughed, a sparkle in his eyes as he eyed the young girl.

"Well, you have ta beat me 'least once! Then ya get ta be tha lead'a!" a small smirk played over the girl's lips as the light glinted in her eyes dangerously.

"Beat you at what?"

"Anythin' ya can do."

"Well, a fight would be a bit unfair, considering the age difference and all, but I can see if I can lay you flat on your back at least once." the gang leader smirked and reached out to shake her hand, kneeling slightly to reach her properly. Between one moment and the next he suddenly found himself gasping for breath, flat on his back, with the little girl shaking his hand like it was perfectly natural. With a breathless laugh he tugged her down and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Ha! Like I said! Ya got moxy, Oneesan!" and so a short but beautiful relationship began between the little girl and the gang leader.

* * *

Okay, I promise not to unnecessarily overload my writing with random spurts of Japanese, the only time I will specifically challenge MicrosoftWord's idea of what's spelled correctly will be for names and moments where the suffix is important. Bolding the word just makes it seem threatening or something, so unless it carries special meaning, like in the last line, I will just put the English word down. By the by, Oneesan does mean big sister, right? I meant for it to mean that, as a way for him to show how she had seniority, despite her young age. A metaphorical nod of the head for her skills and soon-to-be gang leader status. And if I hear any complaints about how young she is to be flipping gang leaders, go rewatch the series or review the manga again! Honey, though I will admit he is older by far, is just as small! Her penchant for learning faster than normal will be revealed soon!

Keep Calm and OC' On!


	2. Of Resoloutions and Tears!

Okay, so here I am outside the library, 39 degrees out, simply because I just finished enough that I feel it's good enough for an update. Sorry for any grammatical errors, enjoy the story, and expect to meet Haruhi in the next update! I'd say more but it's kinda cold out here!

Keep Calm and OC' On!

* * *

It had been several years since that day, the day many now referred to as "The Day the Silver Wolf Appeared", and many changes had occurred, seemingly overnight. The vicious gangs disappeared and in their place, brotherhoods and family bonds between all ages. Those who wanted to fight because of anger turned into pursuers of righteous justice. The orphanage, Valley of Roses, blossomed into a respectable home for children. The adults who let it fall into ruin and chaos moved out, job offers to better orphanages revealing their faults, and a knowledgeable staff now ran the home. It was still a large place, easily housing over two hundred children on the manor-like grounds, but every child and adult alike knew of the Silver Wolf. Named so because of how her hair danced in the wind and shimmered in the sunlight when punishment needed to be dealt, as well as her fierce protectiveness and clever ability to see to every child's needs and desires, but few ever called her by her real name. To do so seemed to be an insult to all she had done for them, even the newest staff members called her by her alias. Until that day, when she was only fifteen, and school was nearing after a busy summer.

"Isano Mao! Mao-san, you've been accepted!" the overeager manager proclaimed giddily.

A/N: This name should be interpreted from , as many websites differ, and if she were to have a middle name it would be Taeko, but from what I understand the Japanese typically don't have one so I didn't include it. Taeko: Child of many blessings. Isano: Help for you. Mao: Center. This is a major hint for her character in itself. If you actually know more about Japanese names and this is incorrect, please do tell me and provide a reasonable replacement that's unisex if possible, to help aid the gender confusion in upcoming chapters. I'd hate to have given my OC a name that probably means something like Bean Fart or Foot Fungus by accident. Sorry for interrupting the story, please read on and ignore my ignorance if it offends!

"Ms. Akira, pardon me, but can you wait outside for a moment?" Mao said with a smile as she gently corrected a child's paint strokes for a landscape picture outside the window. Ms. Akira reeled back with a blush on her face and nodded, unable to speak. No one should look so handsome! What made it worse was that everyone was aware that Mao was a girl, but that didn't stop many blushes from the female staff and children. Not that the boys were any better. Mao stood over the seated child who was busily concentrating on the view outside the large window, glad to be getting some direction in his artwork, and was therefore oblivious to Mao's looks. A soft and gentle appearance that was at odds with the sharpness of intelligence of her gray eyes. The long pin-straight hair that fell to her waist in a low ponytail that oddly curled slightly at the end. Bangs that usually obscured the dark, spiky lashes were pinned up with hair clips provided by a female resident. Her skin was clear of any blemishes or freckles, but had a slight glow from many days out in the sun. Her lips were often seen with a slight smirk or a soft smile. The baggy smock she wore just barely concealed curves, aiding in the male persona that many girls swooned at, and her jeans were also baggy and paint splattered. In fact, the only hint that she was a girl, and not the male many saw her as, was because she didn't tie down her chest like she usually did. And there was a very special reason for that.

The child painting so beautifully had come from a broken home. His father often beat him and his mother, and the only reason he got out of there was because his mother had had enough and called the police. She was deemed unstable after a mental breakdown, so she couldn't take young Takio, and so he ended up here. He didn't respond well around boys of any age, so the subtle reminders that Mao was female calmed him enough so that he could learn, regardless of how strong Takio knew Mao to be. Mao used her androgynous appearance to her advantage so she could subtly better the lives of the many orphans that found their way to the Valley of Roses. In fact, until the orphanage gained a better, and more knowledgeable, staff, she taught everything from art to sports. In the early years, it wasn't unusual to find her in the library, reading up on anything she thought an orphan would be interested in.

It was often jokingly said that her other alias was Jack, as in, Jack of All Trades, because of her wide knowledge for everything. It also helped that in the accident she experienced brain damage, that rather than harmed her, gave her keen senses that aided in her pursuit of knowledge. She could play any instrument by ear, take note of any paint stroke made, and smell the difference in any palate of food. Her ears were particularly sensitive. If she didn't wear weak earplugs, she often experienced a headache, but these also hurt over time, so occasionally she wore bulky headphones. This was a fact that no one dared to take advantage of, mostly because of their utter respect for Mao, and also because everyone know she would have her revenge. The only sense that wasn't dramatically affected was her sight. Well, not exactly. She did require reading glasses, which didn't help the occasional female frenzy among the residence and staff.

"Ms. Akira needs to talk to me, I'll only be a moment, shorten your strokes on the trees and grass, a leaf is only so big." Mao said softly in Takio's ear before leaving the room. A light blush evident on Takio's face as he concentrated. Mao peaked outside of the art room to find Ms. Akira fanning herself, "Do you need me to turn on the air-conditioner, Ms. Akira?" Mao said teasingly with a smirk.

"N-No, that won't be necessary! I just came to tell you that Ouran accepted your application! They had a few stipulations but they're all in this letter! H-Have a good day, Silver Wolf!" Ms. Akira said, slipping back to the respectful alias. Mao chuckled in amusement as she read the letter, a frown appearing on her features as she came to the stipulation. Apparently she'd have to move in with another scholarship student. She was all for furthering her education, but could she really move away from the orphanage? She leaned against the doorway, shifting to watch Takio paint, a blush still evident at the tips of his ears. Mao looked on contemplatively, reviewing all the changes in the orphanage.

It had improved vastly, thanks to subtly differences she enacted, and there wasn't much she could do for them anymore. But there were kids like Takio, who needed someone who understood what he could handle and how to give him what he needed while pushing him in the right direction. What about the three sets of twins, two triplets, and lone quadruplets? Who would give them the space they desired to bond with their reflections while opening their world so they could become the separate people they desperately wanted to become without even knowing it? But even as the long list of needy children appeared in Mao's mind, there was an acknowledgment that battled them all away. The world wouldn't always offer someone so desperate and willing to help people like them. Often times, the world didn't care. Besides, didn't she raise the older kids better than to ignore the younger children, fresh from despair and disaster? What would they do if they knew she had such lack of faith in their ability to carry on, bravely upholding the rules she gave them, even when she wasn't there? Many would be gravely offended, not even hesitating to engage in a fight to take out their sadness and frustration. A few would break from the fragile life they had begun to create. But most of all, Mao would disappoint herself. She had worked so hard, just as hard as she did to improve the orphanage all these years, and to throw it away because of doubt would snub all her efforts, in everything. The kids would be upset, that was a given, but it would only highlight her message to each and every one of them. To chase after your dreams, improve yourself till the point of perfection and continue anyway, and most of all, to honor the lives you've touched and have touched you, no matter how brief or insignificant. That was her goal: to touch as many lives with this core belief, in both others and yourself. This would be a new experience. Who knows, maybe she'll finally learn what her career in life would be, the perfect job that would allow her to spread this belief. This beautiful message. But first, Mao thought to herself wryly, she needed to break it to the kids. How would she do that without falling prey to the mournful eyes of the youngster? Mao grinned, it was the perfect going away challenge. One she would meet with dignity and a smile.

Tears ran down my face as I packed my belongings in the taxi cab that would make the two hour trip to the scholarship student's house where I was expected. The principal of the school easily arranged this simple ride and even paid for it in advance. The entire orphanage waved goodbye, from the oldest staff member to the youngest baby, it seemed as though everyone would miss me. To be honest, I hadn't planned any tears, they just seemed to happen the moment they came out with a goodbye cake and a statue of a wolf that now stood proudly in the center of the fountain in front of the manor. A statue dedicated to my honor. And to think I thought I was subtle for all those years. Well, at least the five artistic individuals that made the statue noticed, though no one questioned it's existence. The orphanage director, Mr. Rikio, even provided me with a cell phone so I could keep in touch while I was away. All the staff members had my number and they had been given strict instruction to only allow phone calls from the kids if necessary, though I had a feeling I would be getting a lot of texts from the kids for a while. I waved back as the manor slowly disappeared, only slightly annoyed to find the tears kept coming.

"You seemed to have been loved." the cab driver said casually. I smiled and tried to wipe away the tears.

"The feeling's mutual, I assure you. Feel free to turn on the radio, I have a feeling I won't stop crying for a while yet." I said as something dawned on me. I didn't have any idea how I was going to get a school uniform.


	3. Of Gum and Gender Confusion

Small shout out to IDontReview, thank you for breaking the mold of your self-chosen name and reviewing! I love reviews and to be honest, a bad review isn't going to break my heart or anything. If needed I'll just go to previous reviews to nurse my pride and solve what needs to be solved to better my writing. Just in case someone was holding back or anything. Expect to meet the rest of the Hosts in the next update, though it may be a while before I update, it has been some time since I last read the manga and my internet via phone is very slow right now. Anyway, enjoy and all that good stuff and before I forget~

Keep Calm and OC' On!

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For the two hour trip the cab driver and I sat in quiet contemplation. The radio filled the silence as I played around on the phone. It wasn't a fancy model or anything, just a durable flip-phone. I had already changed my background three times and designated a ring tone for all my contacts. I suddenly received a picture through text. Opening it I realized it was Takio's painting from a week ago. He did beautifully. Silently, trying not to burst into tears accidentally, I cropped it and set it as my background. Perfect. The view outside the window was artfully painted in bright colors. The colorful rose garden outside seemed to go on forever and the willow tree looked like a silent guardian. I paused for a moment, unsure if I was seeing the picture correctly. Nestled under the willow tree sat a group of children, and right beside them, a silent and ever so watchful silver wolf. I chuckled, trying to combat the fresh tears that sprung forth. I closed my phone, hoping to regain my composure, when the cab came to a stop in front of an apartment building.

"We're here, Miss Isano. Do you need my help bringing in your things?" I shook my head with a smile.

"No, but thank you anyway. Have a safe drive, Mr. Cab Driver." he looked at me, for the first time, and smiled. His eyes the color of brown sugar.

"It's Mr. Pinoko. Have a good school year, Miss Isano." I nodded my head and got out, wordlessly removing my suitcase from the trunk and watched for a moment as he drove off. The neighborhood appeared to be a nice one. Not fabulously wealthy, but certainly well off enough that trash didn't litter the street. I pulled out the letter and checked the apartment number before searching for it with my eyes. There. I easily carried the suitcase to the proper apartment, and knocked. The first thing I see when the door opens up is an over excited woman. But the minute the stranger embraced me I realized that he was a transvestite. No woman has such broad shoulders. I had helped raise a transvestite or two and knew better than to bring up gender.

"Oh you poor dear! Growing up in an orphanage only to make your way to our humble home!"

"Dad! Do you even know if that's Isano or not?" a feminine voice said in outrage. He pulled back, realizing he may be mistaken, and I was able to properly see his features. His makeup was artfully applied, it was actually quite astounding how much he looked like a woman, and his features were pleasant. Excited brown eyes looked over me, trying to determine who I was without asking. The wavy fall of auburn hair reaching just past his shoulder blades.

"Mrs. Fujioka, I presume? My, the letter never said you were so femininely beautiful." I said teasingly with a smile. He giggled and shook his head, catching onto my teasing nature.

"No dear, but thank you for the compliment. I'm a professional transvestite, you can call me Ranka! You are Isano, right?" I nodded my head.

"Well, Ranka-chan, since I am living here, you can call me Mao. I assume you're Fujioka Haruhi?" I said, leaning to see his daughter. Her dark brown hair was as long as Ranka's though not wavy but they did share a few features. Her wide brown eyes were obscured by thick glasses.

"Yes, I am. Dad, are you going to have her stand there all day, or are you going to let her in?" Ranka easily stepped aside, muttering something about being so cold while casting tearful eyes at Haruhi.

"Nice to meet you, is it alright if I call you Haruhi?" I asked while removing my shoes. She nodded her head and I smiled.

"Well, since you are living here for the school year." she said.

"Then, just call me Mao. Thank you for having me, if you need anything just ask! Oh, by the way, how am I going to get a uniform?" I asked, realizing that I had only a week until school started.

"The uniform costs too much, so I can't afford it either, but you can borrow some of my dad's old clothes. It will be a bit raggedy compared to the actual uniform, but we can make do." I nodded, though I did wonder just how long Ranka had been Ranka, and not Mr. Fujioka.

"As long as it's no trouble, though I'm pretty sure I have something in here that will do just fine." I liked Haruhi. I could tell she was a rather down-to-earth person. In terms of what she needed, in the same fashion that I judged many of the orphans, I really couldn't think of much. Perhaps, she needs a little bit more whimsy. Not from me though, but a whole other level of WTF to deal with and adjust to. Girl could use a bit more WTF, in the best way. While I thought of how to give her that, Ranka turned towards Haruhi and took my suitcase.

"I'll put your suitcase in Haruhi's room. As long as you don't mind sharing with my darling daughter, that is. Haruhi, do you mind going out and getting some vegetables? We need more for dinner tonight. Take Mao-chan with you and show her around a bit!" I chuckled as Haruhi sighed in exasperation before nodding. I needed to see the neighborhood anyway.

We were just returning from getting groceries when a little kid accidentally put gum in her hair. And by "accidentally" I mean he threw it at her head. Let's just say the expression I gave him ensured the brat wouldn't dare to it again for a very long time. I had also noticed how Ranka followed at a distance the entire trip. Did he often stalk his daughter like this?

"Don't worry, Haruhi. I can get it out with some peanut butter." Haruhi shrugged before walking on without a care.

"No need. I can just cut it, it would be a waste of peanut butter to take it out. A shorter hairstyle would probably be easier to take care of anyway." I shook my head in exasperation. She had such beautiful hair! When I tried to trim my hair, the girls would watch me like a hawk before swooping down and taking the scissors before I could take off more than they'd like. For some reason, people were territorial over my hair. But it gave me a bonding experience for the younger girls, who would love to braid my hair any day, so I couldn't complain.

"Well, at least let me do it. It's the least I could do." I said as I opened the door for Haruhi.

"Alright, I'll go get the scissors. Would you like a haircut? I could do yours." I shook my head as we entered the kitchen.

"No, if the orphanage heard about it, there would be a day of mourning or something. I could barely trim my hair without the girls freaking out. It's like they thought I would get a buzz cut if they blinked or something." I said, a sad smile growing on my features as I ran my fingers through my bangs, momentarily freeing my vision.

"You have really pretty eyes, I couldn't see them with your bangs in the way... anyway, you really loved it there, didn't you?" I nodded my head.

"Yeah, practically raised everyone there. You'll find that I tend to take care of others often. Now that I'm living with you, you're my little sister by default." I looked over at her as she put away the vegetables, "And there's nothing you can do about it!" I said with a smirk while Haruhi rolled her eyes. Yeah, I definitely like her. She's got moxy. And if I learned anything from the previous gang leader, it was that moxy could get you anywhere.

Haruhi and I looked at the prestigious Ouran High School in wonder. I had never seen such an outrageously pink building. As we walked to our class together, because we did share the same class schedule considering our fantastic scores, I noticed the odd stares. I guess we did stand out a bit, considering we weren't wearing the bright yellow dresses that seemed to be the girls' uniform. Why was the girls' uniform so different from the boys? The guys got to wear a blue jacket with gold embroidery over a white button-up shirt and matching blue pants. Where was the coordination? On the other hand, Haruhi and I wore hand-me-downs. Her haircut wasn't exactly something I was proud of but I hadn't cut in a while so it was the best I could do under the circumstances. I was slightly taller than Haruhi so Ranka's old clothes wouldn't fit. Thankfully I had something similar to the khakis and vest, only instead of the brown vest over the white shirt, I wore a cream colored vest. Oddly enough, I didn't find a single feminine garment in the suitcase that I packed. I was so sure I packed at least one dress. My bangs obscured my eyes so I was able to look at the students, who in turn whispered to each other, and ignored the feeling of expectation that raised the hair along my neck. Instead, I concentrated on steering Haruhi past groups of students who refused to move, taking the role of sibling quite seriously. It had been a while since I could be protective of someone. We both found our way to class A. I tuned into the conversation as we went by and barely restrained a smirk.

"What a handsome boy! He should be in the Host Club!"

"Yeah, he doesn't really look related to the other one though." they thought we were boys! I mean, it happens to me despite my long hair, but that was usually after I displayed my strength. Girls can't usually throw a full grown man to the ground. I even bound my chest to fit the clothes properly, so I guess that helps.

"Class, this is Fujioka Haruhi and Isano Mao, our scholarship students, please treat them kindly." the teacher introduced us before directing us to our seats. I sat right behind Haruhi, but I really didn't like the look the two beside her gave us. They were clearly twins, with matching auburn hair and amber eyes, though they parted their hair opposite ways. Haruhi ignored them, and as long as they didn't bother her, I figured I should do the same. I had a feeling that would only encourage them. My main priority way my education and Haruhi. Period and end of story. Though not necessarily in that order. I couldn't help but feel as though I would be seeing more of them though. As they both grinned at the same time before giving each other a look, I couldn't help but think: Oh good lord, I hope not! I had a feeling Ouran would be educative in many ways, particularly in some unexpected ways, for both Haruhi and I.


	4. Of Hosts and Romans!

Somehow, someway, I managed to lose the one person I was in charge of! Seriously, I turn around to ask Haruhi something, and then she's gone! We looked at the libraries for a place to study, yes, libraries, as in plural, and found all four filled with chatty rich brats! There was no way we could study in there. So, I'm running around like a cat with it's tail on fire, something I have unfortunately witnessed due to a small animal bullying problem a few years back, until I hear a loud crash. Desperately hoping it's not who I think it is, I peak into a room, only to find the strangest sight ever. Within the abandoned third music room, was a group of attractive guys and Haruhi, standing beside a broken vase in shock.

"-Do like the romans do. If you don't have money, pay with your own body!" the violet-eyed blond said. I was all for attacking this pervert, but he wasn't finished yet, "From now on, you are the Host Club's Dog!" well, that was an improvement… on something. I carefully looked around, trying to decide what to do. There were the twins, looking quite smug for some reason, so I found their attitude suspicious and decided they probably helped orchestrate it. There was also a very business-like guy with short black hair and glasses, he was clearly the leader, though the blond pervert was acting as the boss. Then there was the other duo. In the arms of a very tall and stoic boy, with expressionless black eyes and matching black hair, was what appeared to be a small child. He had golden hair and a child's face but his uniform was clearly that of an upperclassman. It was then I realized something. This was exactly what Haruhi needed. A large, unadulterated dose of WTF. And these people had that written all over them. With an easy smile I walked over to Haruhi and patted her shoulder.

"It's alright, I'll help pay off the debt." this caused Haruhi to sputter back to life.

"You can't do that! I was the one who broke the vase!"

"It was an accident. As much as I think it would be funny to see you angry and lash out, I know you wouldn't break such an expensive object on purpose. Besides, I can't just leave you with these people all alone! That blond one worries me, he seems like a bad influence for you, little one." I said while pulling her closer to me, glaring at the blond pervert. It looked like he was struck by lighting for a moment before retreated to a corner and started to grow mushrooms.

"Ah, the other scholarship student. Isano Mao. In the short time you've been here you seem to have amassed the beginnings of a fan base that may rival a host's in time. You are also boarding with Fujioka, am I correct?" I stare at him for a moment before backing away with Haruhi.

"Ah, the blond pervert distracts you while the shadow king goes for the kill I see. Haruhi, it appears as though I cannot leave you alone with these people at all! Therefore, I will work with you. I just don't trust them alone with you, little one." I muttered into Haruhi's ear so they won't hear me say it aloud. I could practically feel Haruhi roll her eyes. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how I single-handedly bit into a situation I had no idea would cause so many problems… and so much fun.

I had learned the names of the hosts. The tall and silent one was Mori, his childish cousin being Honey, the twins being Kaoru and Hikaru, the blond pervert was Tamaki, and the shadow king was called Kyoya. Apparently they filled specific types that the girls could request. Wild, lolita, little devils, prince, and the cool type respectively. Haruhi and I were now their dogs, we fetched items and delivered food to their proper tables. It became quite clear that this was a whole new world when I watched the female student's reactions to Tamaki and the twins. Tamaki basically told the girl exactly what they wanted to hear, a shit ton of sweet nothings if you ask me, and the twins acted like they were secretly in an incest relationship. The girls screamed particularly loud for that. Kyoya gave Haruhi a thinly veiled threat to kick her out of the country should she try to run and I pulled her closer, glaring at Kyoya. If he tries anything I will-

"Work hard for the eight million yen, Fujioka-Kun." Tamaki blew on the back of Haruhi's neck, startling the both of us.

"Would you please refrain from doing that?" I shot at him with my best glare. He just looked confused before talking again.

"This is one of my best techniques." Haruhi replied before I could even scoff.

"I'm not interested in that kind of thing. Besides, it doesn't really matter, does it? Guy, girl, or appearance… it's what's on the inside that counts, right?" I felt incredibly proud of Haruhi in that moment, easily pulling her into a one-armed hug. Somewhere in the background I heard more girly screams but I just assumed the twins were breathing really close to each other again.

"Well, true… it is so barbarous. God sometimes created humans with perfect bodies and its contents! I know you need to tell yourself that!" Tamaki exclaimed dramatically while posing for some reason. I nearly fell over, uncertain if I should be amused with his vanity or annoyed. Haruhi looked down, deep in thought about something. I could practically see her thoughts, trying to decide what describes him. I leaned over and whispered a likely outcome. Another round of girly screams, what on earth were the twins doing now?

"Annoying?" her eyes lit up with understanding.

"Yeah, that's it!"

"You've understood-" Tamaki started off excitedly.

"It's annoying." somehow, it was more devastating when she said it so honestly. The twins, I have no idea how, were there instantly, laughing at Tamaki while patting Haruhi's back. Meanwhile, Tamaki sulked in a corner. Haruhi tried to apologize but Tamaki wanted to be called king. Before Haruhi could reluctantly call him as such the twins and Kyoya went around him, calling him anything but king.

"Sorry we're late." Hunny said while riding on Mori's back. He basically acted cute and sleepy while Mori remained silent and the girls were fanatic again. I basically drowned out Tamaki, which is never a good idea no matter how tempting, because when I tuned back in it was clear that I missed something.

"Maybe it is impossible with your looks, but I'll train you thoroughly! Let me see… you could probably get… 100 people! If you can get 100 people to request you, you are debt free!" he exclaimed with excitement. Oh, boy. Does that mean I have to be a host too?

* * *

Alright, I have this thing where I just put the entire chapter from an online site on my device and I read it from there, but I refuse to write everything they say, so unless it's super important, I won't be writing it. I will paraphrase if needed but Mao probably won't be paying much attention to the specifics of Tamaki's rants, just saying. If this doesn't work or something, let me know so I can see if I can work around it. I may love writing this but I am also lazy in selective areas, namely copy and paste conversations.

Keep Calm and OC' On!


	5. Did This Just Get Real?

Does no one have a single problem with anything in this fanfic? Seriously?! Am I just that good or are you guys just that nice? All I'm getting are demands to update chapters, which I have no problem with as long as I suck it up and go through the slightly tedious process of setting up the story while being moderately loyal to the manga. I mean, come on, I'm adding another person to this crazy group of WTF known as the Host Club! Something has got to change, which we see in this update. It's difficult to say precisely what the time table is so unless it says a date specifically, I'm not going to mention time as far as the actual events are concerned! Anyway, I've jabbered enough, time to continue onward with the story! Feel free to ask any questions, I will get to them eventually, I swear!

Keep Calm and OC' On!

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Currently, Tamaki was going over small etiquette matters, such as placing ones pinky just beneath a glass cup to lessen the noise. I was impressed at the subtle play to lessen discomfort but then he had to spew some nonsense about it making him look beautiful. He looked up at Haruhi from a lower angle and was upset when she wasn't bowled over with his manliness, or some other nonsense, which made me wonder if he really wasn't aware that Haruhi was a boy. Then Hunny, in all his adorable glory, glomped Haruhi, leaving a depressed Tamaki in the corner, inviting Haruhi to cake, which she declined because she didn't really like sweets.

"Usa-Chan is a stuffed bunny for Honey-Senpai."

"Well, I'm not a big fan of rabbits, either…" Hunny got really close to Haruhi, employing Tamaki's earlier low-angle trick.

"You don't like my Usa-Chan?"

"Please let me play with it…" I rolled my eyes, greatly amused with it all as I suddenly picked up a very interesting conversation.

"Tamaki-Sama, I heard about it. I heard that you were taking care of the kitty with no pedigree."

"Yeah… it's pretty sad to be called a kitty…" someone echoed the statement of a beautiful girl with clearly too much time on her hands to be spiteful to Haruhi. Don't ask how, but I could tell she would be trouble, and soon. This conversation took place while Haruhi was out buying things.

"You just can't leave the worrisome alone, right?"

"Oh, how nice of you." she said with a sweet smile. I'll have to keep an eye on her. This proved true after Haruhi brought in the goods, revealing instant coffee, something you'd think would be simple but the Host Club went nuts over it. They acted like it would be an adventure, and while the oddly placed innocence was refreshing, the way they acted made it seem like it could possibly be dangerous. I could practically see Haruhi's annoyance. "They are playing around too much. There's no way it suits their taste." do I detect resentment and jealousy?

"Huh?" Haruhi said politely. Did she really think she was being subtle?

"Oh, I'm sorry. I was talking to myself."

"O-Okay."

"Haruhi! Come over here and make Peasant's Coffee for us!" while Haruhi did that, I subtly leaned over near the girl. Waiting to make my move. "Everyone's waiting for you." Haruhi went over and made coffee while Tamaki seduced the uncertain rich girls into drinking it.

"…Drinking such a thing… Tamaki-Sama is getting crazy. Don't you think so, Ayanokouji-No-Kimi?" the old honorific must have gone to her head if she thinks I'll tolerate any of her nonsense.

"He's being polite to the Peasant Boy. Being so kind is a problem, too." I really didn't like the attitude of her lackey, or the casualness of the conversation. Like they have specific rights to Tamaki's whims, though whether it was because Haruhi was poor, in comparison to them, or out of puppy love for Tamaki, I couldn't tell.

"One should be careful of careless words. They may be interpreted as threatening to certain individuals, particularly in tones of voice, colored with jealousy and bitter resentment." she looked up, a flash in her eyes telling me she knew what I was saying and didn't like it.

"Those of lower classes shouldn't assume things of the upper classes, particularly vile assumptions such as that."

"Calm yourself, princess. I was merely spouting nonsense. But one of "the upper classes" should keep in mind that the lower classes tend to outnumber you greatly. Should it ever come to a fight, which I am sure you, being a gently bred lady, have no experience in, you could be inclined to lose. Dancing around is rather tedious, so let me sum it up as such: don't mess with Haruhi over your own girlish emotions that are, as of this moment, ungrounded. You may find yourself with more opposition than expected." I made sure to keep up the attitude of lightheartedness and a smile on my face as I lowered my view, causing a blush, but only the look in her eyes told me it was out of anger instead of embarrassment or the like. When she looked into my eyes, which were now visible with the tilt of my head, a shiver went over her. Now that, I wasn't sure if it was out of fear, which she should have, or something of the more gentle persuasion. I noticed her friend was on the floor in a pool of nose-bleed. I didn't kill her, did I?

"Everyone. We'll try the Peasants' Ramen today!" did the Host Club turn into a casual "Peasant Lifestyle Research Club" overnight? Hosting hours weren't going to start for a while so everyone seemed to be just hanging out. I watched in amusement, though one bit did worry me. "You are wonderful! May I express this feeling with my body?"

"Please don't." Tamaki was uncomfortably close to Haruhi while doing this, but her expression showed clearly her disinterest. That's my girl! Enter the Hitachiin brothers and their short lesson on the girl fetish of Yaoi, Shounen Ai, a softer form of Yaoi I understand, and the forbidden relationship of twins. Did they just decide this is or did women kind come to a consensus about it and inform the twins? I have almost gotten their differences down to a pat, but to effectively tell them apart, I'd need a little more time.

"The problem is once again, the visual…" Tamaki said before taking off her glasses, this can't be good, "But then… probably taking off the glasses won't help much, probably just make the eyes smaller…" Haruhi, bless her heart, defended her grand-father's old property without reacting to Tamaki's invasion of space.

"I lost my contact lenses a while ago, so for the meantime…" Tamaki froze a moment, clearly noticing her beautiful eyes.

"Hikaru! Kaoru!"

"Yes!" they appeared with scissors and a haircutting cape. Hey!

"Kyoya, give a phone call to the school designated tailor! Mori-sempai, if you have extra disposable contact lenses, share them!" just a small note, Tamaki is not full of good ideas at his best, and this is not one of them. Only use your own prescribed contact lenses or glasses, or risk harm to your eyesight. But enough breaking the fourth wall!

"What about me?" Hunny said brightly.

"Please eat some cakes, Honey-Senpai!" I consoled Honey after Tamaki's comment and joined him for the moment, unsure if I should be offended that the twins immediately started cutting Haruhi's hair. Tamaki stopped, suddenly realizing that he may have missed me as well. Oh dear, this cannot end well. He rushed over to me and a hand shot at me, but I caught it before he could brush my bangs back.

"Can't I eat cake in peace?"

"But, Isano-kun, I must see!"  
"See what?"

"If you hide your true beauty as well!" what nonsense is he spouting?

"Even if I do, the girls back at home would never tolerate a haircut unless they supervised it. Trust me, I know." but I released his hand anyway, not really bothered when he brushed back my bangs and gasped. The image of a sleek wolf seemed to appear behind me in Tamaki's eyes, my own eye shape greatly reminiscent of the wild beast. My piercing silver eyes had an exotic tilt to them thanks to an ancestor long ago from somewhere in India, and were framed by thick, black lashes that really didn't necessarily need mascara. His hand seemed frozen for a moment and I couldn't resist teasing him a bit. "You know, wolves are known to bite for such rude and sudden displays. Don't make me do what a wild wolf does~!" I said with a lopsided smirk that revealed very sharp canines. His arm shot back and he seemed terrified for a moment before he regained his composure.

"I have taken the liberty of reassuring your friends back home that it will only be a trim, no more than two inches will be removed from any strand. You have very avid fans, Isano." Well, wasn't that awfully familiar of Kyoya to drop the honorifics. Oh, wait, I do the same, so I can't really complain. As for contacting my "friends" I couldn't help but wonder just how much he knew. Did he have dark secrets in that notebook of his, or just business, or was everything his business? I suddenly received a text from one of the staff members, holding my phone a distance away from me so I could read it: Everyone wants a picture afterwards! We miss you! This was followed by a string of emoticons of excited and sad faces. I snapped my phone shut and looked off into the distance, not wanting to burst into tears in front of the Host Club.

"Come on, Isano-kun!"

"Yeah, we already gave Haruhi a proper cut!" Hikaru and Kaoru said without missing a beat. I didn't do that badly!

"Fine, but just a trim, and you have to take a picture. It seems a few people want to have one for some reason." I briskly said, brushing off the sudden desire to burst into tears. If either twin noticed, they didn't comment, so I assumed they really didn't notice or care as they dragged me off to get a trim.

I helped Haruhi with her tie, having already fixed mine. We had kicked out the twins but changing with each other wasn't a problem since we shared the same living space. Not like either of us had different parts or anything. I seriously wonder how long this charade would last. She looked adorable and just slightly feminine in the boy's uniform. The twins kept their word and only trimmed the dead ends and cut my bangs short enough so you could actually see my eyes now. I think I cut a rather handsome figure in the uniform, my eyes and hairstyle bringing just a hint of wildness to the front. I just might give Mori a run for his money, but that's my confidence speaking, I assume Mori had quite a bit of money and wasn't likely to lose it to a stray breeze or something.

"Why do you bind your chest, Mao? It really doesn't help people's assumption you're a guy."

"It's a habit from the orphanage. Trouble makers don't take girls very seriously and every bit helps." I carefully groomed Haruhi's hair with a comb and put it away. It's show time.


	6. (Fixed)Backstory Day! Mark your Calender

Okay, the little window where I copy and paste everything is very small right now, only fits about four or five words, which is very weird and hard to make a decent author's note about. What was I thinking before now? Uh... oh, right, I noticed that I seemed to be blurring out the environment quite a lot, which shouldn't bother those of you who actually know what's supposed to be going on, and I promise that while it wasn't on purpose it does make sense, logic that will be explained in the next update... where's the bar where you can change font and crap anyway?! I can't make a decent line like this so... ugh, let's just assume that my little catch phrase means end of authors note, 'kay? Well then, enjoy this update, I had to separate events because I wanted to devote quite a bit to Mao's efforts against a certain individual(?) bullying her. Let me tell you, she is not happy! Hehehe... Anywho~ Keep Calm and Carry On!

Okay, hold on, fixed it (more like avoided it) by making a new document and uploading that, so if you see unusual formatting, just ignore it for the moment! Okay, for real now,

Keep Calm and Carry On!

"Oh, are you two finished changing yet?" Tamaki said excitedly. Is it normal for grown men to be excited about other men -I'm pretty sure they still think we're guys- changing clothes?

"Yes, but could you not be so excited, someone might get the wrong idea about you." I said loudly, causing Haruhi to hit my arm in retaliation. We both cast aside the curtain to reveal us in all our glory. Tamaki immediately gushed over how cute Haruhi looked.

"-And you, Isano-kun! You look quite handsome but still oddly feminine, just like my darling Haruhi! Oh, daddy's so proud!" I pulled Haruhi out of Tamaki's embrace rather quickly after that. I gave him a hard glare as the other hosts complimented us. Something about his behavior reminded me of someone, but who?

"Haru-chan, Mao-chan, so cute!"

"If you had that face, why didn't you tell us earlier?" one of the twins said in exasperation.

"Because then, we'd be as conceited as you guys. And by that, I mean you two twins and Tamaki. I don't know everyone else well enough to say the same." I deadpanned, causing Tamaki to go back to his emo corner.

"Maybe you two could manage a customer or two." Kyoya said. Ah, always business, eh? By this time, Tamaki had recovered his usual energy.

"Yes! Everything was calculated!" what a liar, "Here, now is the time that your true worth will be revealed! Go show the people you thin veneer of beauty!" oh, so he's aware that looks are only the surface? My, my, what a surprise. Looks like it's time to be an actual host. I just hope I don't come to regret getting so involved with them.

I honestly didn't realize that hosting was mostly talking with them, weird shows weren't actually necessary for most of these girls.

"What are your hobbies?" Haruhi looked a little overwhelmed so I took that one, turning my head to the girl who asked.

"Well, I'm a little whimsical, so it depends on my mood, but I'm always ready to help Haruhi out. Sometimes I want to play music, draw, or even knit on a rare occasion."

"Wow, you can do all that?"

"Well, not on a level that would beat a professional, I assure you, but I like to think I'm quite good at all kinds of things." I gave her a mischievous smile as she gave a girly scream and passed out. The hell? I looked behind me but the twins weren't doing anything weird, so I just shook my head in exasperation and picked her off the ground, setting her gently back onto her chair. I fixed up her bow and neatly fixed her hair before sitting back down again. I noticed a strange amount of girly stares but ignored them. I didn't realize that they had continued on with questioning Haruhi. The host club was commenting a small distance away about how polite Haruhi was and how her innocence was refreshing. Don't they have customers to serve?

"Your mother passed away 10 years ago from an illness? Then what do you do about household chores?" a girl asked worriedly as Tamaki moved a little closer to spy on us, though I assumed it was mostly Haruhi. There's something wrong with that one.

"I do it myself."

"And I help when she can't reach the top shelf." I added cheekily, earning a light slap on my arm, "So violent~! What's a big brother to do with such an tsundere sibling?" I teased while pretended like that actually hurt. Haruhi just rolled her eyes before getting a far away look in her eyes.

"But in all seriousness, my mother loved cooking. She left a lot of recipes while she was hospitalized. Learning how to cook them one by one is fun, and when I cooked them well, my father was pleased." I put an arm over her shoulder and rocked to the side for a moment in sympathy, "I love those times very much." she suddenly looked so adorable! The customers blushed and asked if it was alright to see us again. Well, I certainly didn't mind that in the least! Tamaki called Haruhi over to his table where that girl from the other day sat like a haughty princess in her court. Though, my vision may be colored with irritation, considering her hostility towards Haruhi.

"Haruhi! This is Princess Ayanokouji."

"Oh, very nice to meet you." Haruhi gave a small, indiscreet smile, immediately setting off Tamaki's weirdo switch.

"CUTE! You look so shy, and that's so cute, cute!" Tamaki suddenly tackled Haruhi in an embrace. I only just managed to avoid it, thankfully.

"GYA! Let go of me, pervert!"

"What the hell do you think you're doing, weirdo?! Let my Haruhi go!" I tried to pull him off but I only got swept into the embrace as well. God dammit! Haruhi looked around desperately as I tried to pry Tamaki's arms off of us.

"Ah! Mori-senpai, help us!" and just like that we were lifted out of Tamaki's arms and onto Mori's shoulders.

"Mori… you didn't have to go that far." Tamaki said in shock.

"I'd hate to say this, but I actually agree. You could have just knocked him out."

"Mao, I think that would have been a bit much."

"Ah."

"I was asked for help, so I helped." Mori stated simply, earning a round of girly screams in the background. Tamaki wasn't phased for long, he went around Mori's back to pester Haruhi.

"Here, come back to daddy!"

"No. I don't need two fathers!" if it wasn't for the fact that Haruhi really wasn't bothered by Tamaki's teasing, I would have whacked him upside the head. Even then, I was tempted to do it, just for troubling us with his antics. I felt the hard glare of someone and easily guessed this only added fuel to the fire of a certain guest's jealousy. But I had customers to deal with, so when Mori let us down I easily cast Tamaki into his emo corner.

"Stop wasting our customers' time with your stupidity, Tamaki." I said coldly but smirked as soon as he was in his little corner and sat back down.

"That was mean~!" a girl cried tearfully.

"Well, it was the least violent way to get Tamaki to stop bothering us so we could get back to you guys, since "contrary type" over here doesn't approve of violence." I said playfully, fixing Haruhi's hair from her little adventure.

"You sure like taking care of people, don't you?"

"Yeah, why is that?" I looked at the two guests, then over at Haruhi, before sighing. I guess today was spill your life story day. Damn, forgot to mark my calendar.

"Well, when I was young, I had a mommy and a daddy like everyone else. Back then, my hair was a shade or so darker than Haruhi's hair, just like my own mother, actually. I got my silver eyes from my father. One day, my mom discovered she was pregnant, not with just one baby, but twins." By then I had everyone's attention, including the eavesdropping host club members, "It was still too early to tell their sex when that fateful day in January occurred. The bridge was covered in black ice, a crash happened just a few feet after the bridge, so my father started to slow down. He was a cautious driver, but it was enough to set our car spinning past the railing and into the lake, with the help of a car that as behind us but didn't slow down quick enough. The car was probably on the frozen lake for three, maybe four, heartbeats, before it crashed through the ice." my eyes began to water a bit and someone handed me a handkerchief, "Thank you… none of them made it. It was a miracle I did myself. I was hospitalized for months. Ever since then I always seemed to view others as my potential younger sibling, taking care of them by instinct alone. Since Haruhi shares some features with my family, I act like an older sibling naturally. I also treat others the same way, like everyone at the orphanage I grew up in, but if it really bothers any of you, just say the word and… I think I can manage to back off." I dabbed my eyes a bit before giving them a reassuring smile. It was so hard to be a badass when you cry so easily. Well, not as easily as Honey can, I'm sure, but well enough.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't of asked! You can treat me like a younger sister anytime you want, Onii-san!" the girl who gave me the handkerchief said tearfully as the others nodded vigorously. I squirmed in my seat for a moment before embracing her. She just looked so adorable with her doe-like eyes and reddish-brown hair!

"Oh, how can I not when you look at me so adorably?!" Haruhi gave me a look of pure exasperation, "Don't you worry, little one, you will always have a special place in my heart!" I sat back down and gave Haruhi a cheeky smile before giving her a big hug too, though I added a kiss to her cheek. Suddenly, the girls at our table were out cold and many squealed at the top of their lungs. Seriously?! The hell are the twins doing back there? I gave them a curious look but things were going normally, at least, as normally as it gets around here. Mass hallucination?


	7. Bullying, Tempers, and Genders Revealed

I guess we had to stay at each host member's table to see how they handled their guests. That would explain why, the next hosting session, Haruhi and I were seated at the twin's table.

""Which one of us is Hikaru?" game!" they declared with an identical pose and their hair styled up so you couldn't see the part. By the expression on Haruhi's face I could tell she didn't think highly of this game. I had played a similar game, but it was much harder with five identical children. I had to guess the names of all five girls who sounded incredibly scary when they synchronized their words like Kaoru and Hikaru did. It took a while, but I found their differences, just like I can see Kaoru and Hikaru's differences now.

"Haruhi, which one do you think they are?" a customer asked Haruhi, who paused for a moment before answering correctly.

"To my right is Kaoru and left is Hikaru." their sunny reply was immediate.

"You got it wrong!" I rolled my eyes.

"Not your right, Haruhi's right." I defended.

"No, I'm right. You guys look alike, but you're slightly different." Haruhi said honestly. The twins looked like they were bowled over as the customers proceeded to compliment Haruhi with stars in their eyes. I was so proud of my little one!

"Wait, Mao-Kun, your finger…" one of the customers said worriedly.

"Ah, don't worry about it, Imoto! I was just cutting up a rabbit apple for Haruhi and slipped a little! That rabbit was quite sly!" I teased while Haruhi got a slightly dark look on her face. Oh yes, in my vigilance I managed to keep Haruhi from cutting herself with a blade someone stuck between the pages of her textbook. I wasn't quite able to prevent all of the bullying tactics, such as her book getting soaked, but I caught a great many of them. Haruhi is aware, though I tried to keep her from knowing, and she wasn't pleased with my attempts to protect her by getting myself harmed like that. If it wasn't for the fact that a certain someone was far too pleased lately, I wouldn't have been able to pin down my suspicions. Without a doubt, Tamaki's customer, Ayanokouji was responsible. She's quite lucky that I haven't caught her interacting badly with or bullying Haruhi. Not many people risk being told off by me twice. My patience was thin as far as she was concerned, and if only I knew it was about to snap.

"Mao, I can't find my bag, I'm going to go look for it!" Haruhi said before dashing down the halls before I could even sputter a reply. Haruhi couldn't actually run, but she sure knew how to get places before you even realized it! I tore after her with my bag in tow, just managing to catch the tail end of her conversation with none other than Ayanokouji, who looked as haughty as ever. I can't believe we share any similarities, regardless of how small general eye color is! It disgusts me! Her eyes were different from mine, but on a drivers license, it would read the same. Gray/silver. Some people have differing opinions on precisely what to call it, though silver matched mine better than gray, like hers did.

"Thanks to Tamaki, you look a lot nicer now. Why don't you fix the faults in your upbringing too?" she giggled as Haruhi ran out to get her bag out of the pond. SNAP. I put out my arm, blocking her way before I even realized I had moved. That… that bitch had the audacity to giggle after saying such a thing! Though, it should worry me that my temper was so frayed where Haruhi was concerned that such a small thing would set me off. She stopped in surprise, having bumped into my arm. "Ah, Isano. Why don't you go help your fellow pheasant get-" she stopped as soon as she made eye contact with me. My blood was no longer boiling, it was frozen solid, and that ice had spread to my eyes. They were no longer a sharp silver, they were the color of a smoking gun barrel. Unbearably hot yet cold to the core. An oxymoron if I'd ever heard one, but that was how it felt. And judging by the look in her eyes, that was what she thought. No one pisses off the Silver Wolf and gets away with it, and bullying someone under my protection so pathetically was a one way ticket to utterly and completely pissed me off.

""Faults" in upbringing?" I growled out, "Why don't you fix the faults in your personality before you go mouthing off to Haruhi, someone a thousand times better than you, bitch." I was feral by then, I doubt I could calm myself down if I didn't leave fast. If I couldn't reign in my temper… well, with the way things are looking, I don't think this school would approve of murder. The source of my anger had paled considerably but managed to put on her haughty smile anyway. Was she asking to be beaten to death?

"Oh Isano, your parents must have done a poor job of raising you if you can't even recognize your position in life, I am at the top and you, a poor little orphan, are at the bottom. But then again, they did die, probably the best moment of their life, leaving trash like you behind." she was trying to tear me down, and if that truly was her intention, then she shouldn't have tried such a pathetic approach. Not very classy or subtle at all.

"I expected better bullying tactics from a spoiled princess who lives in an ivory tower, sucking on a silver spoon her parents gave her. Something at least a little more graceful, perhaps." I grabbed her shoulder opposite of me with my still outstretched hand and pulled her closer so I could hiss into her ear, "Your tower leaves you an awful long way to fall, princess. I wouldn't mind dragging you down to the dredges of the poor to scatter what's left of your remains where no one would care. And trust me, they wouldn't care about your pathetically small remains. Maybe some decent soul down here will bury you in a shallow, unmarked grave, just to feel a little humane, but I doubt it." by now I had lost it and she was shaking with the violence of the images she herself imagined, "But then I'd have to taint myself with your dirty blood, but don't think that leaves you in the clear. Haruhi is under my protection, if you stray the path again, I don't mind getting a few boxes of cleaner to mop up the mess I'll make. So be a good little girl and stay away from my little one. I don't care about your petty jealousies that belong on the set of a high school drama show or Pre-K. Just leave Haruhi alone." I flipped open my phone and snapped a photo of her face that was still in shock and deathly pale. I guess no one has ever actually stood up to her like that, though I may have taken it a little too far. Rich brats like her are often a bit more fragile than they appear.

"Y-Y-You wouldn't dare touch me! My parents are wealthy and influential!" she cried out as I started to walk past her. I closed my phone and put it away.

"My, your parents never did teach you the truth, did they? Fact of the matter is, sweetie, that if you piss off the wrong people, things like that don't matter anymore. You're just as vulnerable as the next mortal, your funeral will just be a bit fancier in the end, that's all. Don't think too hard on that picture I just took, by the way. I don't tend to align myself with gutter trash who would do bad things with such a simple picture. But it is enough to identify you, should you decide to do something rash, I know people who are familiar with gutter trash, just waiting for another challenging target. As long as you're a good girl and mind what I said, you should be alright." I mocked with a sadistic smirk over my shoulder as her knees collapsed under her weight. Jeez, I wonder what would happen if people learned just what kind of reputation I have earned over the years. When will the true meaning behind the "Silver Wolf" be revealed? I looked out the window, barely noticing the frantic, stumbling footsteps of the scared girl as she ran away, and smiled at what I saw. Haruhi held her wallet up high in celebration with Tamaki right beside her. The smile dropped and my eyes narrowed. What the hell was that pervert doing without a shirt on?!

I was not pleased when Ayanokouji requested a session with Haruhi, specifically mentioning not to include me. If it wasn't for the slightly devious look in Kyoya's eyes, I wouldn't have allowed it, come hell or high water. He knew about the bullying, I could tell. So I watched silently, though it was more along the lines of glaring, as she tried to make one last move at Haruhi to get her far away from Tamaki. I was distracted for only a moment by a customer offering me tea, and suddenly I heard a loud clatter. The table had been pushed over and Haruhi was on the floor.

"Help! Haruhi suddenly became violent!" Ayanokouji cried tearfully, "I knew he was barbarous. Somebody, hurry, this peasant-" she was suddenly drenched in water and I felt pride in the host club for the first time. The twins, in sync as always, had dumped water on her head and looked incredibly bored with her antics.

"I'm sorry." Kaoru said.

"Our hands slipped." Hikaru finished. Ayanokouji looked shocked and more than a little pissed. Kyoya was suddenly there, pictures in his hands, cutting off any objections she may have had.

"Did you think we didn't know about it? Please don't look down on our information network. Of course, we have evidence on the other issue as well." Kyoya was quite a scary entity on his own. Hunny suddenly appeared beside her, tears in his eyes.

"This person is scary!"

"Looks so ugly." Mori, the ever silent host said shockingly. Naturally, it was Tamaki's turn to make an impression.

"You look beautiful outside…" he said really close to the jealous girl's blushing face.

"Tamaki! This guy-" he suddenly pulled away, a very displeased and pissed look on his face as he brushed away his bangs.

"It's no good if you only look good. I'm sorry to say this, but can you please never come back?" his eyes fell into a very hard glare that almost had me flinching, "You cannot be a customer if you behave badly toward my fellow club member." Ayanokouji looked around desperately, her eyes connecting with mine only briefly before all the blood left her face. Maybe I shouldn't have been giving her such a feral smile? She dashed out of the room with tears in her eyes.

"We have that kind of customer every so often." one of the hosts said with irritation. Haruhi looked up at Tamaki, probably thinking the same thing I was. That he had, for once, looked really cool defending her.

"A punishment for causing trouble. Add another 100 customers to your work quota." and the pride just… shrivels up and dies as far as Tamaki is concerned.

"HUH?!" Haruhi sputters.

"If you weren't here, I wouldn't lose my best customer… and I wouldn't have to look for wallets with this beautiful body~"

"Senpai!" Haruhi said in irritation. I could definitely sympathize.

"I have high expectations for you, Natural Rookie." while Haruhi was in her own version of an emo corner, with me there to comfort her, Tamaki picked up a student ID from the floor, "What's this?"

"It's probably mine." Haruhi said simply. Uh-oh. I looked around but the customers were all gone, I guess they cleared out with all the commotion.

"…Haruhi."

"Yes?"

"Are you a girl?" I didn't expect him to be so forward about it, that's for sure.

"Yes. Biologically at least." Haruhi didn't notice Tamaki's world crumbling beneath him as he soundlessly sputtered in shock. The host club commented from afar.

"He has finally noticed."

"But he probably knew by instinct. Nobody would do that much for a guy."

"I knew it from the beginning~!"

"It's a pretty interesting development." Tamaki was still speechless but his face was incredibly red.

"If senpais thought of me as a guy, I figured that was okay with me. Probably my consciousness of being a guy or a girl is lower than other people. And I'm not that interested in appearances, either. Oh but…" Haruhi turned around to Tamaki and smiled, "But you were cool earlier, senpai." Tamaki blushed like crazy and I started laughing in the background.

"Is this the beginning of another love story?" Kyoya mused, turning to look behind him slightly.

"Oi, no breaking the fourth wall!" Kyoya gave me a confused look, "If you don't know, never mind then."

"And actually, I realized it's not that bad to be popular among the girls. I'm probably a little into that~" Haruhi mused to herself while Tamaki tried to scramble his wits together.

"Hey! I can't allow that! I can't have my precious daughter…" he scrambled for something to object to as his eyes looked over at me, "I can't have my precious daughter living with a man! I won't allow it." the hosts all looked over at me in realization and I smiled.

"Actually, I'm a girl too."

"WHAT!?" Tamaki screeched. I pulled out my own school ID to prove it.

"Yeah, I would have corrected you sooner but it as just too much fun. Surprised it took you so long, in fact. But something concerns me…" Haruhi looked over at me in question, silently asking me to continue while Tamaki recovered from shock, "Was Ayanokouji aware Haruhi was a girl? Was that why she felt so threatened? Or… did she honestly believe that Tamaki was gay and into Haruhi? To be honest, I wouldn't put such an attraction past that pervert." I said bluntly, sending the previously recovered Tamaki into shock and his emo corner yet again.

"I-I have two daughters?" Tamaki mumbled to himself, "And they both hate me!"

"Hate's such a strong word… personally, I'd rather not be related to you in any way, nor would I want my little one to be, either." and with that I single handedly K. the host club leader while the others had recovered from their shock.

"We thought something was weird about you." Kaoru said, putting a hand around my shoulder at the same time as Hikaru.

"But we didn't actually think you were a girl. We just thought you and Haruhi were an item or something." Hikaru finished. They what? Damn, I'm surrounded by weirdos! And it's my own fault!

"I guess that settles it. Haruhi is the Natural and you will be the Sibling Type." I looked back at Kyoya and smirked.

"Whatever floats your boats, captain!" and there went any hope of Tamaki recovering any time soon, though Kyoya looked rather pleased at the high title. I took a moment to reflect on my actions prior to now. My attitude with that… that girl, left much to be desired. I can't be so quick to threaten in the future if I want to quietly protect Haruhi. I also cursed aloud, something I prefer not to do, but I couldn't help but feel I was perfectly justified. Someone needed to give her a reality check. She can't just push people down for being better than her at something, or for having the attention of a schoolgirl crush she was obsessing over. Her attempts to hurt me through assuming opinions of my parents didn't hurt me either. She didn't know them and she didn't resemble them in any way. She had no right to say such things, regardless of how justified she felt in her petty source of revenge, but I did wonder if my parents would be proud of my actions. The last thing I wanted to do was shame them.

"Come on, Mao! There's a sale on fish at the market today!" Haruhi said, her back over her shoulder and a smile on her face. Something told me they would be more than proud of me for defending Haruhi, in fact, anything less would probably shame them. I let out an amused sigh, they did always say they just wanted me to be happy. And if protecting Haruhi, partially out of a sense of justice, made me happy, more power to me.

"Sure, but can we avoid that vendor who throws fish at his competitors? That's just unsanitary." Haruhi laughed as the host club looked at our interaction in silence.

"Sure! His fish usually go bad by sale time anyway."

"Probably because they get up close and personal with all those old guys' faces and beards." the hosts didn't really seem to know what to make of that one.

Okay, There's still a tiny little window of improper formatting doom for the copy and paste section. I really hope that's fixed soon. I didn't mean to make Mao so… violent, but it seems to fit her character. She's a very protective person and there is no way she stayed completely sweet after dealing with those gangsters for all those years. Writing Ayanokouji's name so many times was annoying, I'd think I'm done but then I have to write it out again, so annoying. And as for AwarenaTenshi, that's probably correct in the actual manga or the anime, which I can't go by because I don't have it on demand, though I do remember some parts as seen in this chapter, but I'm going by an online version. Perfect, no, I can't tell if everything's capitalized or if it's just the font, but it gets the job done. In the online version Haruhi says "It's annoying.", but thank you for telling me that. I thought it was just my imagination that some of the words were different. When I actually get money I can spend freely, I'm totally stocking up on manga and anime. Got my eye on a anime movie called something along the lines of "Children Who Follow Lost Voices" after getting "Wolf Children"… I cried when watching that one. I just knew that would happen too, the minute I saw it! I turned to my best friend and was like "I know this is going to be a good movie, one that will make me laugh and then cry hysterically, but I WANT TO WATCH IT!" … where was I? Oh, and thank you people who review something other than "please update soon", though it does let me know you liked it. I seem to favor constructive criticism as of late, though my ego just adores you guys for demanding more CX …anyway, next up is the lady manager! Oh boy, can't wait to see how that goes! It may take me a while, I say that every time but end up finishing the next day T-T. Just for fun, can anyone recommend some good anime? I've already seen FMA(Brotherhood and original), and more, vying to see the second episode of Blue Exorcist(?), but I guess I'm really asking for anime movie or manga references. What do you guys like? Romance? Shoujo? Action? Comedy(I should hope so if you read my stuff)? Thinking of adding a bit of romance with another OC in this. Been at the back of my mind, I don't feel comfortable tackling a hostXoc romance dynamic. How do you feel about that? Lol, I'm just asking so many things of you guys today! Okay, I'll leave you guys alone! If you think a character is getting too OOC, just tell me, maybe give pointers! This will deviate slightly from the manga as time goes on, just saying, how could it not with Mao in the mix?

Keep Calm and OC' On!


	8. Of Preppy Parties and Preparing Plans

Okay, the copy and paste box is still super tiny, therefore a murderer of any formatting I may have. Where do I go to report such a thing, anyway? Moving on, I'd like to apologize, this has been ready for a week or so but my mom and I basically got evicted, turns out we weren't supposed to be living above a restaurant in the first place, but the previous owner didn't care to mention that. So now everything we own is at my grandma's house, my current location, and she happens to have WiFi! Lucky us, huh? I'd also like to apologize, I made a mistake in the last chapter, this is not jumping to the crazy host club manager, still needs to go through what I like to refer to as a mini-arc of the December Party! I find the events of that night quite amusing as they are, so I'm taking advantage and using it as a plot device to show you a new side of Mao! She's a vicious little thing, that's for sure. Some thing you will see in the next chapter, which I will probably dedicate almost entirely to Mao's actions with plenty of host club suspicion. Oh, and anyone who thinks the host club would be good spies, have you not seen them stalk Haruhi various times in both the manga and anime? Not exactly subtle. Oh, and one last note in this long ass author's note! SOPA(Stop Online Piracy Act)! You people need to chill. I promise that this law is not entirely dedicated to destroying Fanfiction as we know it! It's actually supposed to be protecting copyrighted laws and fighting against online trafficking of counterfeit goods. Is it harmless? No, not really, this damn thing is apparently so vague that they could put you in prison for five years just for uploading a video of your little cousin singing a copyrighted song or shut down a website without going to court if they violate any of their vague conditions. They swear up an down they have no interest in sites such as youtube, megaupload, and more but that's how they work! They make a law that sounds good, word it as vaguely as possible, then go for the kill on what they really want to take down. The way it is right now, it's like taking a fishing net to catch minnows. Any you do catch are big and slow. Any good seller of counterfeit goods would just change their site name and within five minutes it's back in business. I'm not saying SOPA is a good law, or that it won't affect Fanfiction, but I promise it is not a witch hunt for fan fiction! Imagine if they admitted it was though? How embarrassing do you think it would be if the congress shouted at the top of their lungs "WE CAN'T ACCEPT THESE VILE (enter character)X(enter character) PAIRINGS! (Enter two other characters) WERE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER! WE WILL NOT ACCEPT ANY OTHER PAIRING!" I totally want that on a recording to replay whenever I feel down, it would be so funny. They would be so stubborn and such assholes that they would willingly tear down every fan fiction site in the world rather than just refine their search parameters to read the fan fiction they desire. Go ahead and google it, though be careful not to catch a website too biased, and read all about it. I used wiki but I will admit that they did make a protest against it, but if they're biased, I couldn't catch it in the article. Seemed rather impersonal, though it didn't really go into how effective it could be, but that could be because of the law itself. Okay, I'm done with my rant, do what you will with this new information. On to the story!

Keep Calm and OC' On!

I'd like to point out that I knew the host club was filled with WTF people from the start. I didn't even know their names but I knew this at first sight. However, after a few months went by, it hadn't quite sunk in yet how… special these people were. This became apparent in the month of December. I had been living with Haruhi for quite some time now, patrolling the neighborhood at least once a week to make sure no punk gets funny ideas, and I thought the host club had reached their peak of weirdness. I'm pretty sure Haruhi thought she was desensitized to it as well. Then, as we opened the doors to the club room, we had spent a little too much time in the library, we found ourselves in a very southern county. No, not southern as in redneck, I mean southern as in Bali.

"Welcome." they all chimed at once in their quite revealing wear. I'm not entirely sure how to describe them at this moment. As a girl, yes I am aware of girly feelings, I couldn't find it in myself to complain that the hosts were almost entirely shirtless, although, realistically, I knew it was December and not proper weather for that kind of dress. Not that you'd know with the humid climate and tropical greenery everywhere. Tamaki was obviously a Bali king, though he lacked a crown, he wore what I assume to be a sari that covered his legs and draped over his left shoulder with southern jewelry such as gold cuffs and low hanging collar necklaces. The twins wore, again what I assume to be a sari, around their waist going down to mid calf. Over, or with considering the knot work, was a checkered sari. They wore low hanging beaded necklaces and cloth around their head. Kyoya, who I considered the most level headed, wore just a sari around his waist. Tamaki wore a similar headband as the twins, the similar sari to Kyoya, but he had a sash over his left shoulder. Honey tore a sari around his waist and was shirtless except for a low hanging beaded necklace and those flower necklaces, like from Hawaii. All in all, they looked pretty legit, if only a little ridiculous. Haruhi seemed to be kneeling on the floor, trying to come to grips with the fact that this was her reality now.

"Oh, it's you guys." Kaoru said and Hikaru picked up the rest of the sentence.

"I thought it was a guest, so we positioned ourselves."

"According to my calendar, it is the middle of December…" Haruhi said with a blank look on her face.

"It's only a commoners' feeling to be afraid of the cold and put yourself into a kotatsu! Why do we have this perfect air conditioning system?" Tamaki's creeper mode activated as he posed next to Haruhi, "A good man cannot hid his beautiful body by wearing lots of clothes! It's winter, that's why we welcome all those little kittens with warm southern country aura… it is the real gentlemanly way, isn't it?"

"…It that so?" Haruhi deadpanned and I sympathized with her reaction. I'm pretty sure being a gentleman has nothing to do with dress code. Still, I was quite proud by how unshaken she was by their slight nudity. When I first came to the orphanage it wasn't uncommon to see many guys without shirts on, so I was a little used to it, though I had a new appreciation compared to back then. Without clothes, it's quite easy to see the muscle mass of your opponent, though Hunny didn't give away shit, though I just knew he could fight the best of them.

"And December has the big event, when we'll be shining the most! The Christmas Party, Haruhi!" we were both speechless at that. You mean to tell me that these rich kids know how to have a party? I figured all they could do was sit and look pretty, but lo and behold, they can also dance.

"But first, you two need to get into costume." the twins rolled out two mannequins, "It was the boss's idea." they said with a smirk. A Bali queen outfit was obviously made for Haruhi, I immediately threw it at Tamaki along with mine, another clearly feminine Bali servant costume. It covered the necessities, but what the hell was Tamaki thinking?

"You damn pervert! My little one is not wearing such a thing! For one, it's not her style, and two, it's paired with yours!" needless to say, we wore our uniforms that day, and Tamaki found himself in his emo corner for quite some time.

I instinctively tuned out Tamaki's nonsense that he spewed at a customer, something I could hear all the way across the room for two very different reasons, as well the small chit chat at the other tables. Though I did pick up the fact that there would be dancing at the Christmas party. I don't think anything could drive out the girly squeals that filled the air every once in a while, though far more often than normal, even for the twins.

"It seems like the guests' tension is higher than usual…" Haruhi started before Kyoya popped off an explanation.

"Being naked is popular. We had another plan, too, though. Santa clause costume play… I'm glad I put that Bali scenery photo book in front of Tamaki." I knew there was a reason behind it! In the background, I registered the little scene between Takashi and Honey that ended with a girl fainting.

"I'll go pick her off the ground." I muttered, leaving Haruhi to deal with the guests for the moment. I was gone, what, four minutes, five tops? When I get back, I happened upon this.

"I'm Kasugasaki Kanako from grade 11 class B. You're cuter than I heard. I decided. I'll let you be my favorite." woah now! This chick was smiling down at Haruhi, lifting her chin with a single finger delicately, as though Haruhi was a pet cat for adoption. I was only briefly distracted by the image of a nonchalant Haruhi-cat, walking around, before coming back to the main topic. Though, I had to admit, if Haruhi was any animal, it would definitely be a cat. There's no other animal out there that can be so nonchalant about a change in situation as Haruhi.

"Woa, hey, Isano here, what did I miss, Haruhi? Do you need my… assistance from this customer?" I asked while standing behind Haruhi's chair, tilting it back so she wasn't in contact with the girl anymore. She had a light brown bob, just above her chin, and pale brown eyes that seemed to be in some form of gentle emotion constantly, though the pleased smile turned that into something else entirely. I heard girly squeals in the background at that.

"Ah, Isano-kun, you're just as dashing as I heard. I hope you don't mind me spending time with Haruhi-kun." she said teasingly, her eyes almost daring me to do something. The hell I didn't mind you man-eater! How does Haruhi attract the crazy girls?!

"I don't understand!" Tamaki grumbled loudly while eating ramen.

"Surely being in such a state isn't unfamiliar territory for you, Tamaki." I shot back at him. I didn't have a problem, per say, with Kanako, but I really wish she'd stop making such scary expressions at Haruhi. I think it was the most creepy rape face I've ever seen a girl make.

"Tono- stop eating peasants' ramen and help us make the final plans."

"He didn't like it that Kasuga-Hime took Haruhi?" the other twin pondered.

"It's not like her illness just started." Kyoya said dryly.

"Illness?" Haruhi and I said at the same time.

"So called "Switching Guys Disease"." the twins said at the same time as well.

"Usually regular guests stick to one host forever… but she likes to change her favorite every now and then." Kyoya stated simply.

"It was Tama-Chan's turn a while ago." Honey coined, allowing Haruhi and I to understand instantly.

"I see…. All because I took his guest…" Haruhi trailed off with an unreadable expression on her face.

"NO! THAT"S NOT IT!" Tamaki hissed before looking determined, "I cannot stand it anymore, Haruhi! Wear proper girls' clothing! You too, Mao!"

"Excuse me? Since when did I tell you that it was okay to address me as such? What a unrefined gentleman you are, Tamaki-Kun." I said with a glare that didn't reach him in his hysterical state.

"How can you be so popular among girls when you two are girls yourselves? I tell you, it's only the club members that know you two are girls!" Tamaki shouted, prompting the twins to explain this occurrence.

"They're not taking PE classes since it's an elective."

"And the students' ID numbers are co-ed, so nobody would know!" Kaoru finished for Hikaru.

"Dad… dad wants… DAD WANTS TO SEE YOU WHEN YOU WERE LIKE THIS!" Tamaki pulled out a large portrait of Haruhi in the 9th grade with her long hair. I understood why Tamaki didn't have one of me, my hair really hasn't changed. Besides, I was home schooled, no need for a school ID.

"DON'T JUST ENLARGE MY/HER PHOTO WITHOUT MY/HER PERMISSION!" Haruhi and I yelled at Tamaki.

"I wonder every time I look at this: How can this become this?" Hikaru stated with wonder.

"A neighborhood kid got gum in her hair a while before school and asked me to cut it." I said while glaring at Tamaki.

"As I told you before, I lost my contact lenses." Haruhi said, "I(read: Ore, guy version of "I" in Japanese) don't really mind being treated as a guy. Actually, that's better because I can finish my qouta of 1000 people and pay off the debt of 8 million yen. So…" Tamaki froze before snapping into action.

"A GIRL CANNOT ADDRES HERSELF WITH "ORE"! MOM, HAURHI USES BAD WORDS!"

"Mom? Who?" Hikaru asked in the background. Jeez, all this yelling is killing my ears.

"Probably me…" Kyoya stated.

"Unexpectedly Tono dreams about his ideal girl." Kaoru said helpfully next to Haruhi.

"By the way, do you have any experience in social dance? It's a must for the party." Hikaru asked on her other side.

"No… but the party doesn't count for the qouta, does it?" Haruhi said.

"I do, I could probably teach you if you wanted." I added helpfully.

"I'm not interested in the event, either, so I'd rather skip…" aw, was my little one party shy? I felt a cold chill as Tamaki regained his spirit. Oh boy.

"Fine! If you want to walk the road of men, let me help you! Social dance is a gentleman's common knowledge! IF YOU CAN MASTER THE WALTZ IN ONE WEEK AND SHOW IT OFF IN THE PARTY I'LL REDUCE YOUR DEBT BY HALF!" Tamaki said with growing volume until he was shouting at the top of his lungs. Did I mention I was right next to him by this time? I cried out and covered my ears.

"GOD DAMMIT, TAMAKI! If you want to scream in people's ears go somewhere else before I drill holes in your eardrums!" I snapped at Tamaki, taking out my earplugs gently to relieve the pain. It brought all the small noises to a new level but the pain and ringing began to fade.

"You wear earplugs? How can you hear properly with those in?" Kyoya asked, pushing up his glasses in an intuitive gesture.

"I have really sensitive senses, well, except my eyes, and my ears are particularly sensitive. I'm probably going to have to wear headphones instead until the party. Earplugs hurt after a while and that idiot's nonsensical yelling didn't help matters." I muttered darkly, sending Tamaki into his emo corner once again. I removed the other earplug, wincing as my hearing adjusted to full blast. "I'm going to head home now, you'll be fine walking alone, right? I'd rather not risk anymore of his outbursts now that I took out my earplugs." I asked Haruhi, who nodded. I sighed with relief, sending one last glare at Tamaki to ensure he behaved himself. With a sigh, I left the club room, mentally mapping out the quietest route home. My temper got shorter with the added level of hearing and dull pain throbbing in my ears, no need to start shit because of it.

You know how I said my temper was shorter with my full hearing and the pain in my ears? I wasn't kidding. Naturally, by Murphy's Law that anything that can go wrong will, this warranted the loudest possible gang members to try and mug me. Needless to say, I had then all groaning in pain within a matter of moments. I have not lost my touch, I thought proudly as the leader stepped out. I know this punk was the leader because he walked like he owned the world and that the powers that be bestowed the world his glorious presence out of sheer good will. His eyes were dark, as were his eyebrows, but his hair was buzzed short in a thin sheen of icy blue hair. He was rather tall, almost Mori's height, and looked like he ate raw eggs every day to gain that muscle mass. Either that or steroids.

"Okay, look, I really don't want trouble right now. I'd rather just go home and take some Advil or something for this headache, so if you want to fight, save it. I am not in the mood for playtime." I snapped with plenty of what the previous gang leader of the orphanage called "moxy". His posture remained cocky and relaxed.

"I've seen you around, walking to and from your precious school with that girly boy. I'm sure he'd be up to a good fight." the threat was clear but he continued still, "But very well then, how about you meet me and my boys at a warehouse, a week from now, say… eight P.M. sharp? I'll give you the address and then you can leave. Feel free to drop out, but then we'll have to… chat with your friend. Have a good day." he said with a wink, dropping a piece of paper into my hand that he had already written on. It was a set up, both today and the meeting, but I couldn't back out. There was no doubt in my mind that Haruhi wouldn't stand a chance against even one of them. I looked down at the paper before crumbling it in my fist. This entire thing was a set up. I could feel it. There is no way they wouldn't know that there was a big fancy party next week considering the Host Club was never subtle about things like that.

"Damn them." looks like I need to start preparing again. It felt a little nostalgic but I knew they wouldn't just stick to fists. They'd bring anything they could. Knives, bats, and possibly guns. I wonder why… oh, maybe it had to do with that thug I beat up a few weeks back. He was rather pathetic but still intimidating enough to think he could get away with creeping on unattached girls. Well, not anymore. Looks like Haruhi will have to be tailed for a while, at least until I finish off these assholes. I flipped open my phone and dialed a number I knew by heart. It only rang twice before someone answered.

"'Ey, Onee-Chan. What'cha need?" the thick accent was soothing, but I expected no less from the previous gang leader.

"You still in Japan?"

"Ya?" I let out a feral grin.

"Good, I got some pest to take care of but the pantry needs a good lock. Subtle, safe, and trustworthy. Can you think of any good brand?"

"Oi, we ain't spies. No need to act secretive, Mao-Chan." I chuckled.

"Got a problem keeping up? You're getting old, maybe I should call someone else… Benny, perhaps." that did the trick, I held the phone a good distance from my ear in preparation and wasn't disappointed.

"THA' DAMN IDIOT?! HE CAN BARELY TIE HIS DAMN SHOES! TELL ME WHERE AND WHEN, DAMNIT! I CAN HANDLE ANYTHIN' YA CAN THROW AT ME!" I chuckled darkly.

"Don't worry, old man. It's only for a week, maybe two to be safe. I'll text you the rest of the information. Big Bad Wolf has to hunt some wannabe reds." this time the voice on the other end chuckled as well.

"Good huntin'." then the line went dead. I looked up at the sky and smiled a rather blood thirsty smile. It's been a while since I could go all out and if they went to so much trouble… well, I better not disappoint them.


	9. A Short Prelude to Violence Abound!

I'd rather not go into the details about my training routine so I'll sum it up. I went to school with Haruhi, quite proud that the previous gang leader wasn't visible to the casual eye. I could only see him because I knew he was supposed to be there. Hmm. He trimmed the green Mohawk and added stripes of electric yellow. It looked kind of cool. I now wore a pair of bulky blue headphones that blocked out just about as much noise as my earplugs. Some of the teachers questioned me but they accepted my explanation, as well as the fact that the headphones weren't plugged into anything. The first thing I did while Haruhi was off practicing her dancing with… Kanako, was find Kyoya. He was writing something down in his mysterious notebook, as always, and noted my presence before closing the book.

"Is there something you need, Mao-san?"

"Yeah, I probably won't be there for the party. I'll try to make it but I doubt I'll be in very good shape. Got a pest problem to take care of." and there it was, that tilt of the head that refracted the light off of his glasses like he had a stroke of intuition. I must be feeling paranoid if this little thing makes me worry.

"Do you need help? I know a few people." yeah, I bet you do, you suspicious shadow king!

"No thanks. If I can I'll make it but don't hold your breath." I said with a dismissive wave. I put in a little time with Haruhi while she hosted. The first dance lesson I took over for a bit until… Kanako got there and taught her the dance moves. While I was reluctant to leave Haruhi with that girl I knew that the host club would be watching her. Especially Tamaki. That weirdo has been sulking in a corner ever since he learned that he wouldn't be teaching Haruhi on account that he's too tall. "I have to go take care of some stuff this week, so my club time will be a bit short. See you at dinner, Haruhi!" I ran out before anyone could stop me. My training consisted of a solid hour free running through the city, taking the long way to get to the apartment. When I got there I changed clothes so I wouldn't mess up the uniform. Luckily I didn't do too much free running so my uniform wasn't very sweaty. I changed into shorts and a t shirt. Now was the fun part. I ran, now doing some hard core free running, jumping over anything I could, Mario jumping the walls onto roofs using narrow alleyways. When I got to the outer edge of the city I found an empty warehouse, not the one I was supposed to meet those punks in, and trained with the random objects I found on the ground. Any pipe, chain, or large rocks I did everything imaginable with them. Anything from throwing to battling imaginary foes ruthlessly. I would remember to bring a few weapons to tuck into my shoes, small knives or something. Wouldn't do to be caught unprepared. When I had sweat pouring off of me, subtle muscles screaming from their workout, I stopped and began to laugh hysterically. Oh yeah, I was beyond pissed, and I had so much adrenaline running through me it wasn't funny. And it wasn't even the deadline yet. Yeah, I was a vicious bitch in certain situations and there was no way I was going to let these punks think they could get away with this. Ain't no one mess with Isano Mao, the Silver Wolf. Ain't no one.

Okay, I apologize for this short update but I have reached a road block of sorts. I wasn't able to properly get the necessary chapter down on my ipad so I could read it off line. Conveniently, I wanted to ask something. Do you guys think that they should discover her in that little "Pest meeting" or should they be in the dark for a little longer? Note, if they do find out, it will trigger the whole "your family now" thing with Tamaki that you've been looking forward to. At least I think so, I know I have, but the timing wasn't right when Mao revealed her past in a little more detail. So, I'll be unable to write until Monday, when I go back to school, and get that chapter down properly, maybe a little longer, so I'll have plenty of time to see what you guys would like to see. Sorry if you expected a longer chapter. Well, as always:

Keep Calm and OC' On!


	10. Of Fights, First Kisses, and a Waltz

I trained rigorously and imagined every possible weapon that could be used against me. Did I go overboard? Maybe. I doubt that clown has a samurai, but better safe than sorry. I was so busy training I barely managed to keep updated on the dance. Though I was relieved to hear about Kanako's fiancé. So now I knew she wasn't creeping on Haruhi with any actual amount of seriousness. At least that's one thing I didn't have to worry about. The previous gang leader also updated me on Haruhi's safety every day, almost as soon as incidents happen, but I knew she was in good hands.

Then it was finally the day of the dance. I already packed a duffel bag with a tux, bandages, and a few medical supplies. I had about three hours before the dance and I was due to meet him at the warehouse at the same time, so I wouldn't be there when they started up the party. I felt a strange mix of anxiousness and excitement that usually came before a fight and I honestly didn't know what to do with myself. The only thing that kept running through my mind was that the previous gang leader better not reveal himself.

Haruhi walked to the store, everything was already prepared by the staff but apparently Tamaki ran out of ramen and needed more. Even with the elevated status of a Host, Haruhi was still stuck fetching "Commoner Things" for the ridiculous host club, but mostly Tamaki. He somehow manages to involve everyone else in his antics. Maybe that's why he's president. She walked a little faster, careful not to spill her precious cargo, when she suddenly bumped into someone really tall. Actually, he was around the same height as Mori, though she couldn't imagine Mori with a green Mohawk. Then again…

"Whoa, hey there doll. Didn' mean ta run into ya like that! Well, I gotta go and stalk you from a safe distance! Be safe!" he called over his shoulder before she could even say a single word.

"Wait!? What the hell did he just say?!" Haruhi exclaimed as she started to go blue from shock.

Yeah, Haruhi is in good hands for sure. With a sigh of aggravation I picked up the duffel and patted down my clothes, making sure everything was in it's proper place. Wait, almost forgot the rope. Jeez, what am I thinking? Rope is so important. I just can't tell you how many times it comes in handy. Then, without looking back, I walked to the warehouse that was undoubtedly a trap.

Yep. I knew it. There were at least twenty five assholes right out front. They smirked at me as I walked past and into the spacious interior where the dumbass ring leader himself stood, proud as a scrawny chicken on top of the hen house, in the center of the warehouse. Also as predicted, he held a bat and a knife was strapped to his waist. This was going to be fun. I tossed the bag to the side and stood, arms crossed and a confident smirk on my lips. The baggy sweatpants and hoodie hid any curves I had as well as weapons I had hidden on my person. If, by some miracle, they were unarmed I would kindly as if I could remove my weapons, but clearly that wasn't going to happen. There was no way I was going to reveal my weapons now. I preferred to go without using weapons in fighting but I needed something just in case.

"What's with the duffel?"

"Don't mind that. I have to go to a party afterwards and I didn't want to ruin the suit." he gave me an almost patronizing look.

"Oh, I don't think you'll make it."

"Not if you keep flapping your gums, num-nut. How are we doing this? One at a time or mass mayhem? I recommend all at once, saves time and it also happens to be your best choice to beat me." he was awfully sensitive if that's all it took to piss him off.

"NOW!" well then, let the games begin. Surprisingly -not really- he stayed back a bit while five morons came at me from all directions. Moron number one came at me from the left with moron two and three. A quick tug and throw over my shoulder sent him hurdling into moron four and five at my right. Moron two and three were dispatched with a duck and weave to the right of moron two, a hard punch into the kidney of moron three, and a roundhouse kick to the back of moron two's head. All within the span of seven heartbeats. That makes five down and around twenty to go. Oh yeah, it was good to be bad and back in action, I thought as eight guys rushed at me from the entrance of the warehouse. Did I laugh like a mad scientist? Maybe, but I doubt the morons were lucid enough by the end of the fight to mention for sure.

The party was just winding down and I had to admit that it was quite fancy. With a chuckle I located Haruhi in a tux sitting against the wall. I sat down quietly next to her with only a slight limp. A bastard went down and decided to swipe and my left calf. It only cut it a little but I was just glad I didn't need stitches. I settled for firmly bandaged, along with the cut on my right cheek, my left forearm, and a cheap shot about five inches long at a slight incline to the left in the middle of my back. Ass-wipes. I would have beaten them even more if they weren't already unconscious by the time I noticed and my consciousness refused to allow me the luxury of petty revenge.

"You look rather handsome. Did you have fun?" Haruhi looked over at me in surprise.

"Yeah, but what happened to you?" thankfully, I didn't have to dodge that particular question because the twins' voices burst through the crowded room.

"Now, we'll have the last event. This will be given to Miyako-hime, the top point getter. A blessing kiss from king… modified… FUJIOKA HARUHI!" a beam of bright light suddenly spotlighted Haruhi.

"Devil Twins say what!?" I shouted as Haruhi and Tamaki turned white from shock.

"HEY?!" Tamaki yelped suddenly.

"It's all because Kyoya said if we have an accident at the end, it would be more fun." the twins replied with a shrug while the guests began to chatter excitedly. Kyoya came up and whispered something in her ear that I barely caught.

"How about doing this instead of the dance? We'll cut off your debt by 1/3." then she was all on board while I glared holes at the back of Kyoya's head. That bastard! Just what crazy ideas have they been getting?

"Don't worry, I only have to kiss her cheek." Haruhi reassured me as she walked by.

"Isn't this her first kiss?" Honey mused causing Tamaki to freak out. But it was too late, Haruhi was already leaning in to kiss Miyako's cheek.

"HOLD THAT KISS!" Tamaki yelled in outrage and jumped to stop her… ultimately pushing Haruhi forward into a kiss on the lips. Kyoya, that dark bastard that he was, looked rather pleased with the events. The audience roared in approval and wonder at Tamaki's actions. Tamaki struggled to explain his actions as Haruhi, bless her heart, gave him the cold shoulder for making her sacrifice her first kiss like that. She then totally dismissed Tamaki and ate cake with Honey.

"Hey, what's with the cut?"

"Yeah, and you're limping." Kaoru said after Hikaru inquisitively. A lonely girl in a dress walked by looking rather dejected and I found my escape.

"I'd totally answer but I have a sudden desire to dance with that girl there. Totally unrelated and not suspicious." I walked over to her with a gentle smile, ignoring the twins' sputtering protests, "Hello there, maiden fair. I know there isn't any music at the moment, but would you care to dance? If it helps, I'll hum a waltz tune." she blushed severely and looked down, her dark eyes a little misty.

"Are you sure? I mean, I'm rather plain…" ah, one of those, eh? Weird, you'd think a dark and femininely cute pixie cut would bring more confidence.

"Even the most beautiful flower appears plain among it's humble leaves before it blossoms. So, will you allow me to take this dance, and blossom for the trouble while in my arms?" I said charmingly. I probably shouldn't be dancing with this cut on my calf but I couldn't help it. I did not want to talk about my past as the Silver Wolf and the… abilities that I gained from my many years as such. And so, I hummed the tune for the Vietnamese Waltz like a dork, and gracefully made a complete stranger blossom. All to avoid talking about the warehouse full of morons, completely unconscious and severely injured. Yep, I have a feeling I won't be able to avoid that topic forever. Why was I keeping it a secret again? Oh yeah, people start acting weird when they know. Not that this place could get any weirder. Damn, I just jinxed myself. This can't be good.

Ha, sorry if there wasn't enough violence for you or anything. I've never done anything large scale like that and I didn't want to botch it, so I kind of glazed over a good part of it. At least Mao got injured and everyone is more than a little suspicious of her now. Just wait until Renge appears in the next update. Can't wait to see how that goes! Anyone have any idea what type she'll try and assign Mao? Hehehe, neither do I! Let's find out together!

Keep Calm and Carry On!


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